Romance scams start with a fake profile and a fast, warm relationship, then turn to requests for money. The FTC's main rule is never to send money or gifts to a sweetheart you have not met in person. If a relative may be involved, approach them with care and stay calm.
The pattern
The FTC describes how these scams run:
- A fake profile appears on a dating app or social media.
- The scammer builds trust with frequent contact and often moves the chat off the platform.
- They claim to live or work far away, for example overseas, on an oil rig or in the military.
- Then come requests for money for medical bills, travel costs, visa fees or crypto investments.
- Payment is requested by wire transfer, gift cards, money transfer apps or cryptocurrency, because these are hard to recover.
Signs to watch in a relative
You may notice changes before you hear about a partner:
- Sudden secrecy about a new online friend.
- Money going out by unusual routes, such as gift cards.
- A partner who can never meet in person or appear on a live video call at short notice.
- Talk of an investment tip from a romantic contact. The FTC says a romantic contact who offers investment advice or asks for money or crypto is a scam.
How to raise it
Shame closes people down. Lead with care: "I worry someone might be taking advantage of your kindness." Ask questions rather than issuing verdicts. The FTC suggests stopping contact and talking to someone you trust, which gives you a natural opening.
Practical checks it recommends: search the person's job plus "scammer", and run a reverse image search on their profile photo to see if it appears under other names. Offer to do it together.
If money has gone
The FTC says to contact the bank or payment company right away and ask for a refund, report the scam at ReportFraud.ftc.gov, and tell the dating app or social media site where it began. If cryptocurrency was involved, the FTC's crypto page notes payments are typically irreversible and lists the exchange used as a place to report; see crypto scams explained for families.
Protect the accounts too
Scammers sometimes want more than cash. Help the relative review passwords and turn on multifactor authentication, as in family password habits.
Quick check
What is the FTC's main rule?
Never send money or gifts to a sweetheart you have not met in person.
Why do scammers ask for gift cards or crypto?
The FTC says these payment methods are hard to recover.
Sources
Last reviewed: 19 October 2026.
